How To Overcome Co-Dependency In Your Marriage?

This article is especially written for spouse –

1. whose other half is an addict or has deep personal issues, 

2. whose partner or when both of them are going through difficult times emotionally and financially that they ended up arguing and blaming each other.

3. or other half who is physically or emotionally handicapped or both.

Based upon observation and listening to couples sharing, it has been discovered that are what most couples went through in one way or another but did not want to disclose openly. 

For fear of losing face and pride in front of family, friends and relatives.

But out of blind love and faith that somehow their marriage and relationship will pick up, a wife often called in sick for her alcoholic drugs or gambling addicted husband or vice versa. 

Or taking over the housework because her poor spouse is just too depressed to help or they simply could no longer afford a maid to manage those. 

As a result of these, they often find themselves bearing huge emotional and financial burden of the entire marriage and family which also affected their children – if they are parents – as well. 

In this case, this particular spouse becomes a co-dependent which becomes a serious issues in marriage, families and relationships with children if they do not know how to handle those properly. 

Because more often than not, those issues are not as simple as what he or she expected to be if the other half is more concerned with those issues less than the hurt that could be caused to jeopardize the relationship and even marriage. 

Out of frustration and despair on being a burden to family and even kids.

So having said that, how can one overcome co-dependence in marriage and family life?

The first step in beginning to overcome co-dependence is to acknowledge that problems exist and different actions need to be taken to identify and solve them. 

Both of which require self-and-professional help.

Considering they stemmed from deep seated psychological problems.

The second step is not to allow past shame and humiliation by other people be a stumbling block to seek advice from counsellor or psychologist.

Additionally, there are programs similar to Co-Dependents’ Anonymous that will help couples process each other’s issues with essential guidance and tools. 

This is especially the case if a spouse is facing financial hardship, legal trouble and handicap that prevents him or her from leading the normal life prior. 

However if he or she acts in an abusive manner whatsoever, more radical measures must be taken to address this. 

For the sake of self-respect and for children, the best remedy is for the spouse to break away from the situation even if it requires leaving home or getting divorce in worse case scenario. 

Although this could have a negative influence on children if they are parents, it is still necessary to ensure they are safe long-term.

Get help from family, friends, church people and even professionals specializing in marriages and parenting. 

Amy WatermanAmy Waterman is a marriage counsellor who helped many couples get their relationships back on track with her experience and knowledge in this arena. 

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